The Goldilocks Zone
In science, especially in astronomy, the “Goldilocks zone” refers to a habitable zone around a star where conditions are just right for the existence of liquid water, making it potentially conducive to life as we know it. This concept originates from the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears, where Goldilocks chooses the items that are neither too hot nor too cold, but “just right.”
This zone is neither too close to the star (where water would boil) nor too far from it (where water would freeze), but instead lies in the intermediate region where the temperature is suitable for liquid water to exist.
We can also apply this to non-planetary situations, if you will. The “Goldilocks zone” applies to our everyday life, be it social, work, family, education, and et cetera.
When I was in primary school, I had the luxury to choose where I sit, and choose my “desk friend” for the entire term. Most of the time, the “naughty” students will choose to sit at the very back, thinking they can get away from teacher’s attention and make noises. The smart kids are always at the front rows. Some kids, like me, want to play it safe and choose somewhere in between, somewhere in the middle rows, with less attention. I was thinking that if I sit at the back, I don’t really like hanging around with the noisy and rough kids, and teachers tend to already group them as “bad kids”. If I sit at the front, I don’t want that much of an attention. So, the middle rows become my “Goldilocks zone”. Just right.
This principle also applies to our everyday decision, including ordering things at the restaurants. Starting from where we dine, where we sit, and what we order. Maybe at that point we are too tired from walking and we want some nice air conditioned place with comfy cushion seats. However, we know that convenience of a place brings up the price to some extent. So, we know the trade-offs. We might order something a bit cost-friendly, or less than what we expect, just to be able to enjoy the space. On the contrary, when we eat at a fairly inexpensive places like streetside hawkers, we can indulge in more food because we think it will be worth it.
Of course, sometimes we don’t have a choice. Other people or hard circumstances will define where we are and what we eat, or what we do. This is often the case…
However, where and when we can control it, I think we should be able to make the choice for ourselves.
This includes career choices.
I always believe in Goldilocks zone principle for careers as well. At some point I was so confused about whether I really want to be climbing the career fast and be a manager, director, VP of design and so on. To raise up in the status. To be seen. To be heard. To have more money! Oh the sweet stuff in life.
Then at some point in my career, I just want to lay low… and do the “stuff”, and be an IC designer forever. I don’t care about individual development goals, self improvements or any internal program like that whatsoever, thinking that I could just stick around as long as I can do my job.
Looking at Linkedin posts of fellow tech workers, you can see how people are trying hard to get validations, climb up the career or social ladder. Some others lay low. People say if you want to succeed, you have to be able to “market yourself out there”. What if I just want to be myself?
I guess 2016 was one my turning points. Prior to this, I was so pumped to climb up the career ladder and get promoted to leadership position. I worked and tried so hard to convince my stakeholders, but alas, I was in vain. I guess I was too impatient, but I couldn’t help but still be disappointed. However, people still think I did well in my IC role.
I moved to Singapore in the same year, and I was in a design lead position but was not managing anyone. However, I worked for a company that eventually I enjoyed, so much that I did not want to leave forever. I had really good and fun coworkers. I took a comparative paycut (I say comparative, because salaries in Indonesia and Singapore are a bit different, but to get the same standards of living… you get it?). I was paid more in my previous Singapore job two years earlier, where I was poised to lead a team. This time, I took a bit of a “downgrade”.
It turned out I was a little bit happier, but it grew on me. I became happier as months and years went by.
In that every moment, I told my wife, “This might be my Goldilocks zone.”
It’s at that very moment I realized: Maybe, there’s a point in our career or job or calling that it might just be “nice enough” that we don’t want more, but still something pleasant enough to live by and be thankful for. The “enough” zone, the “secure” zone. Maybe I get paid less, but enough to live comfortably, and still like my job. Maybe, this is a level or position that is “high” enough for me not to feel overwhelmed by politics and organizational pressure, but still gives me adequate challenges to grow however I like. Maybe it’s also the good environment or company or mission that I could live by.
Is it the same as comfort zone where you don’t grow? Not exactly. I think you should find a place that prioritizes your wellbeing and psychological security, yet still provides you some opportunities to try to grow. However, you don’t fall too far if you fail. It should also contain a few risks that you know and calculate, and have things you don’t like to do but you can still tolerate. There might be things that are too far out and you deem impossible to achieve in this zone, but not trying it doesn’t kill you.
Here’s what it might look like (pardon my sketchy Canva illustration):
As you see here, I don’t put the blobs (or zones) as linear as a “ladder”, because our life is messy — it’s not a straight path.
Well, some people can think of it as Ikigai, but I beg to differ. Mine is more realistic. While ikigai feels like something you want to achieve in the future, or something that you’re still looking, the Goldilocks zone is more like a present realization of where you are now, and a mindset of every action you take. Having ikigai while having a Goldilocks zone is a the most wonderful thing ever, but if you can’t have your ikigai, you can still have your Godlilocks.
In the end, there’s one advice I’d like to give for every budding designer out there:
Look for your Goldilocks. Find a safe space where you can tolerate mistakes and failures, but still feel good and optimistic enough to grow. Not everyone has to dream big.
Originally published on my Substack.
